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.P R A X I S. 12 year old me knew in his heart of hearts that there would come a time for growth; away from comfort, away from all that would make me feel in control. At the time, I believed that this moment would come when I changed schools, or had my first relationship, or even when I made known that which plagued my soul. The thing is, although I felt such loss of control in all those instances, I still felt a semblance of comfort; comfort in the knowledge that I could still go back home, and recoup once more. Moving, however; moving cities, and changing lifestyles, has opened me up to so much that was not issued into the social praxis that I believed to be true. . Leaving, he said, I shall do as others, and still stay me. . Moving away from home, in any capacity is said to indicate growth, independence, stability, and the first steps into adulthood. . How I wish, Knowing what I now know, That the choice was never really mine. . I have not done as others, and I have not found the stability in my new independence that I had heard of for so long. I have fumbled, and lost myself a number of times. But come to think of it, those decisions, however ludicrous, still allowed me insight, and for that, I am glad. . I walk today, Like many years ago, With the spirit of longing, And the thirst for truth. . Whether I achieve the things I seek to, or realise the vision of the man I aim to be, I shall never know, unless I tread this path of loneliness, moving through the darkness that blinds me, with the hope to move onward and into the light. I finally feel like I've arrived here, where I'm supposed to be at this moment, and that's all I can ask for, as knowledge of the space one occupies, and the impact one has, is all the truth one needs in the end. . And onwards, Onwards, Onwards, He tread. . Martyr- Sevdaliza #s7edge #vscocam #art #poetry #photography #blog #tone

.F A Ç A D E. Pictures rarely tell you who you're looking at, smiles rarely mean what they're supposed to, people rarely are who they portray themselves to be, for what they really are, is not free. Those who have met me on a surface level, and those who I've let see the man undone, know two different versions of me. Looking at the kooky picture you'd think I'm feeling my oats, but the thing is, on that particular day, I was super super down. The thing is, for the longest time, I hid myself away during periods of pain, or melancholy, but over time I learned to slap on a silly face and roll with the punches: and looking back at it, the latter served me better. Although you don't instantly feel better, wearing a façade on the outside, helps heal what's on the inside; helps steer the mind, and the spirit toward something more positive than the slump you find yourself in. After all, white lies you tell yourself don't really count as lies, right? Through many an eye, I've seen myself, and through many an ear, I've listened, and though things change, my name does not, and that makes me feel less strange. At any given point in time, choose yourself at your happiest, and silliest. Allow the negative emotion to pass with your breathing, and allow yourself to be free, in a body that feels naught, and wear that mask, till comfort allows, to never have to wear it once again. Outré Lux- Photay #mentalhealth #love #s7edge #art #poetry #vscocam #blog

.D U S T P I G G Y. Jamie | ˈdʒeɪmi noun: 1. The given name of the sun warrior, Jameson. Known for being a small, silly ball of happiness, who loves scritchy-scratches in the morning, and ferocious hugs before his bedtime (scattered throughout his 20hr sleep schedule) Also goes by, Beanie, Beandog, and lovingly, dumbass. Today marks two years since we opened our hearts, doors, windows, cupboards, laundry hampers and the likes to this little kitty who believes he's the mightiest of all cats. A lot has changed in these two years, and my father who was sceptical about bringing in a cat, now wakes up at five every morning to feed him, and sit with him out in the lawn, watching him "hunt" a host of insects. He's brought so much positivity and love to all who have met him, and continues to do so. The hardest part about moving away will probably be switching from a meowing, paw-taps-to-my-nose alarm clock, to a digital one. Little bean, I love you. Someday- Akira Kosemaru #catsofinstagram #s7edge #art #cat #love #vscocam

.P E T R I C H O R. Have you noticed how the smells of the Earth reflect your moods, and thoughts? How the flush of the first rains leave behind reminiscence at times, and nothing at all during others? . Their first interaction was nothing special, save the petrichor that emanated from his rapidly drying heart; salty tears on a long-barren ground, that had almost forgotten how it felt to love, that had almost forgotten how it felt to feel. Nothing special, and yet. . Maybe our being is so deeply rooted in the element, that the rains are symbolic of the changes within us. Maybe we don't think enough of what it means to be fluid, and what it means to flow. To allow the scents of the Earth to permeate the deepest barriers within ourselves, and bring to life hidden places of surrender, and sacrifice; love, and joy; to relive, if even for a moment, under the veil of the rain, those memories that we hid, and are likely to hide once more. Have you ever noticed how the Earth reflects you? Human Bog- Baths #s7edge #art #bnwphotography #poetry #blog #vsco

. T E T H E R E D. Aren't we all? To something? To someone? God, Heaven, Karma. Isn't our understanding, perception, and reciprocity determined by that which we tether ourselves to? Isn't that why philosophers of old have 'state of nature' cornerstones? Life is perhaps created thus, in sequences of remembering and forgetting; knowing that we are tethered, and then forgetting, only to return to the loop once more, in countless variations of belief and repudiation. However, our tethers are not fastened to the ground, and our return to these cycles are not endless. There is escape, and escape is to constantly question, challenge, and sever the ties we have with that which holds us down. Life is short, too short for stagnation. Sever the ties with all that weigh you down, to rise above your former self, free to find a higher you. Aum. Arrows- Haux #s7edge #poetry #art #noir #love #photography #vscocam #blog

. R E T U R N . The year so far has been filled with settling emotions; recouping from the intensity of the year preceeding it. A lot has happened that lays as a backdrop to the channels through which I explore this year. I've lost a dear friend, at too early an age; I came out to my folks; I struggled with a lot of anxiety related to the path I would take at the end of Law School; and yet, in the wake of all of that, I finally feel like I'm returning to the man I am, and understanding the true release, and fluidity of living right. The healing that has to happen at the end of a long period of hurt, will be cathartic, not because of the path of troubles you have overcome, but because you found yourself at the end of that journey. Every feeling you have, Every fleeting thought of success, Every crush, or personal victory, irrespective of what others see it as; it is valid. You are valid. Return to yourself. Your-self. Harlem River- Kevin Morby #s7edge #art #oiloncanvas #photography #faith #vsco #vscofood #selflove (swipe for details)

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